When enough is really ENOUGH!
This morning, I woke up with the craziest feeling! It's not that I've never felt it before. I've definitely been here before but I guess I didn't think I'd be here again so soon. The feeling was the need to get some things in order. Though it was soon replaced with nausea after my morning breakfast (Ugh!), I'm so glad that it was filling my space. I kinda wish that I'd recognized it during my wrestling match with insomnia the other night. That was surely a great time to get some ish on the right path. Let's just rejoice that I'm at the crossroad here, now, and right on time! The major epiphany that you've been waiting to hear...I have enough! Yep, that's it! No, really that's it. I have enough material things to last me quite a while. Though I'm not an exclusive gadgets or designer threads girl, I do like the experience of shopping. For me, it's less to do with the actual item purchased and far more to do with the process of it. Guess that makes me an experience girl? Maybe? Back to the moment of clarity...
As I look around, I see that I have all that any girl like me could want. I have a space of many awesome mini-experiences cataloged by some kind of artifact whether an impractical dress, one-of-a-kind necklace, cheeky coffee table book or perfectly-me set of stationery. All of these are enough for me! Then naturally, I asked myself exactly what's next for me to get into. I had to take a quick inventory of how I felt about this whole thing because I had to make sure this didn't mean that I'd climaxed in life. This just wasn't possible. Hell, I'm not even 30 yet! Talk about a short climb to the top! Not the case here so I talked myself off the ledge. I was actually relieved because this turned the spotlight onto what was behind the creative flood that I've been wading in for the last few weeks. I'd acquired my (current) heart's desire and now it was time for me to move from consumer to producer. Now it's my time to take all my creativity and put it to use. There's no reason for me to dream in blockbuster, heart-pounding color and not be able to translate it to something for tangible. Today that ends! The experiences will continue but now just from a different angle!
P.S. I really LOVE writing in this Nyquil-induced whimsy. If you don't mind, I'm just going to archive the drafts that I have on my hard drive. Maybe they'll get to come out one day. Who knows!?!?
Disclaimer: Moments like this don't always go as smooth as described above! There may a a flicker of panic in me. Inside, I was screaming "What?!?! What?!?! This can't be happening to me! What is wrong with me?" Then came a tiny whisper that said "maturity". That was it! It was settled! This was a moment of maturity. No way that I could argue with that! I got somewhere and sat real still to hash out my game plan for handling myself in this juncture.