Guilty Pleasure

I've had that song on repeat for some time now & it never gets old. I've been waiting to see a video but nothing's popped up yet. The collab is perfect! As much as Wale can prove to be an ass with his Twitter antics, he can lay a track. Rick Ross has been on some of my favorite songs lately. Something about him seems like he knows how to be man in all situations. All girls like a man that will take care of business & just allow us to watch him put in work. (Message!) Jeremih's vocals just kind of tied the two together. Whoever put this together hit the nail on the head! My favorite line is Wale's "You'll probably find someone but you'll never find another!"

One day...

...you'll be next in line for {insert major life event}.

...you'll have your own house & make whatever rules you want.

...he'll realize what he's missing out on.

...you'll forget how crappy of a day that you're having.

...you'll see that all your sacrifices were all worth it.

...you & your nerdy husband will have nerdy kids & live in a big nerdy house. **an awesome gem courtesy of my mom when I came home from elementary school & told her someone called me a nerd

...you will see all of your hard work pay off.

...you'll look back & realize things worked out for the best.

Every muscle in my body tenses up whenever someone starts off a sentence with "One day...". It feels that once again, someone is telling me that I can't have what I want. Granted, sometimes, the statements are valid. Still, it's not what I want to hear. The one day that I thought would be exempt of such a phrase was my birthday. I was sadly mistaken!

As I sat there watching my friend watch me cry like a starving newborn, I was lost on how I could flip from a great day to the monstrosity of a moment that I was experiencing. We've been friends for over a decade now so we have shared these moments before. Having her comfort me with some of the phrases above was not uncharted territory for us. I'd done the same for her in like moments. Never once had I believed that things would not be fairy tale perfect for her when it was all said and done. For some reason, in this moment, as she spoke the words to me, I could not accept it as a truth. Why is it that when it seemed that I could get what I wanted, it was being removed from stock with a note saying "COMING SOON"? The information I'd just taken into my system was surreal. I felt like I'd just been drop-kicked in the chest (repeatedly). With each mouse click & scroll, I took another kick right to the heart. Dancing in my head were the thoughts that what I was doing by reading it all was wrong. (I'm not above taking the blame that I have in this.) Those thoughts were intercepted by "Here we go again!", "I wonder if I would have ever known.", "Did I think I was that special?", "How hard is it to just tell me the truth?", and "WOW! WOW! WOW!" I wanted nothing more than to travel back in time to just one of several very specific points where I could have prevented this moment, us or anything pointing to the crushed feeling that'd taken over me. It was too late & there is no way I can unsee or unfeel all of this. The damage is done...self-inflicted & friendly fire. (Geez, extra dramatic moment! Blame my parents for creating a Leo baby.)

Am I jaded? Yep! I won't pretend like I'm not. This stuff gets real old; real quick. You can't help but feel slighted.

Will I recover? Hell, yes! My faith in who I thought he was & what we could have been were killed but this didn't kill ME! (More dramatics! Sorry!)

Will I forgive? I have no choice. Non-forgiveness on my part means that I don't practice what I preach. Every week, I share that I don't deserve forgiveness but through grace & mercy I receive it. HOWEVER, I will not forget. Not that crazy chick steeze where she's throwing it in the guy's face every 20 minutes. Just the flag inside that'll remind me that losing is sometimes the best form of winning.

I shall continue to wait for the "one day" that all of those "One Day..." declarations come true manifested as doors and no longer walls.

Dear 30s: We're off to a pretty effin' horrible start! Spare me & start to redeem yourself soon!

The countdown begins...(and rambling about my rambling)

I'm awfully ramble-y lately! I'm not sure what the deal is but I feel like I'm much more talkative than usual. I'm 99.9999956% sure that it's because I'm rounding my last days in my 20s. I guess instead of going out & blowing money on things I don't need, I'm gushing with random babble. God bless my friends for bearing with me. Luck for you that you only get my 2 cents if I click "publish post". The loves of my life get a dose of me by way of phone call, BBM, GChat, text, carrier pigeon and sneak attack. There's not nearly enough wine, chocolate & shiny things by which I could sufficiently repay them for the energy they expend to keep me sane (and from running off to be a nun who sneakily drinks wine in her room of the convent while waiting on the hot Italian guy who delivers the bread each day. If I'm going to finish my days in a convent, at least, allow me to view the merchandise since I can't touch it!). As I was saying, My friends are the bestest that a girl can have & I don't take them for granted a single day.

Speaking of awesome friends, I'm planning to couch surf at a friend's in the very near future. Since my trip last summer, I've spent over 365 days craving pizza from Gino's East in Chicago and I think I will explode if I do not consume it soon. So to Chi-town I will go! I'm not really up for a Dirty 30 party so I'm just going to hang with my friend, eat my way through the Gino's East menu, frolic on Pennsylvania Avenue for a few days, then bring it back home. This is how I want to welcome my 30s! I'm silently counting the days until my feet touch Midwest soil!

P.S. I got the Instructional Design Specialist position that I've been going after & I am so excited! It's taken a month of exhausting interviews, pushing myself and encouraging words from friends. Again, I feel blessed beyond measure!

Rub-a-Dub-Dub!

Lame title, I know, but here's the 2nd part of my adventures at the TN Natural Hair & Wellness Expo!

It's no secret that I'm a huge fan of bath and body products, even more so if they are all natural. The expo was packed to the brim with ladies proving that we can "cook" in the bathroom, too!

First up is Andrea of The Bubble Bistro! I heard many great things about her before I could even find her shop nestled inconspicuously in Midtown. I was ecstatic to see she was on the list of vendors for the event. She's always a pleasure to talk to & her work in unbelievable. She carries products for men & women including bath bombs, body oils and shampoo bars. If you live in Memphis, you've definitely heard the buzz of her products by now. I couldn't resist leaving without a few goodies for my stash!

I snatched up 2 soaps, a scrub & a body butter!! SCORE!

Peeking my curiosity was table featuring Divine Clementines's Dope Soap on a Rope. How could you not love these adorable little soaps! The line is made of four scents: Lavender Goats Milk, Teatree Goats Milk Oatmeal Cookie, Peppermint Goats Milk and Coconut Ylang Ylang. The creator of this line is based out of Atlanta with roots here in Memphis. With true Southern charm, she juggled her line of customers while giving me the back story of how she got started. I scooped up a couple of her heart-shaped soaps for the road & let her get back to business. Her table was selling out fast!

Another Atlanta-based line getting quite a bit of attention at the expo was Miss She Body Cocktails! No doubt that we ladies need a cocktail here & there and here's one you can enjoy without feeling bad. Of course, I was digging for info on how the line of bath teas, body washes, salt scrubs and signature Beurre Mousse came about. Turns out the founder, Shelia Driver, has a background in the Legal field. This former Legal eagle has definitely found her niche here in the world of bath and body products.

Looking back at my goodie bag that I amassed at the show, I'm surprised that I didn't go broke at the expo. I have enough products to last me until the end of the year. The best thing is that everything has a long enough shelf life (when kept out of water) to sustain until I can get around to it. Definitely, a great investment if you keep the schedule I do and love to pamper yourself every once in a while.

I felt this was totally appropriate!

See you later!

Gimme that!

The other day, I had a tad bit of free time after work and I decided to swing my Anthropologie. This place normally gets me in so much trouble. (Not so) surprisingly, it's not the clothes that I have a hard time resisting. It's the random knick-knacks they sell that I must have. Only in Anthropologie would I feel completely justified in purchasing a $25 notebook. Despite my weakness, I ducked in and quickly fell back into bad habit. I resisted as much as I could by leaving with just a belt. I wore it out on a date last night. (I'll spare you the sad details of that monstrosity!) I can't wait to wear it more!

Here's what caught my eye! Maybe I'll get something with the 15% off birthday card they sent last week.

Don't act like you're surprised that I'd be drooling over a book!

Love this cute dish for keeping up with my rings!

Despite my coffee addiction, I thought this would also work as a cute alternative flower pot!

I have such a weakness for skirts & dresses!

The kangaroo pouch pocket on this Dolce Vita number is a plus!

Though I have been keeping shopping to a minimum for essentials, I did "splurge" a bit on a recent trip to Starbucks. Overall, Beyonce did pretty good with 4. It's taken me a while to like most of the songs. My favorites are Party, Countdown, Rather Die Young & Run the World. Bey rarely does wrong in my eyes & she delivered for me on this album. It's worth checking out!

Naturally Awesome!

Last weekend I had the pleasure of attending the Tennessee Natural Hair and Wellness Expo. It was nothing short of exciting and amazing to see so many people come out to support the event. The vendors and workshops were great! Though I was only there a few hours, I met quite a few wonderful people that I can't wait to stay in touch with. I thought I would be able to cover the entire event in just one post but I'm going to have to break this down into a few parts. Bear with me as I get it all together. And special thanks to Alycia of All Day Natural and Elle of Beale Street Chic for asking me to cover the event. If you haven't checked out their blogs, GO NOW!!!

The first table I spotted was shared by Leah of Etniq Cosmetics and Nakia of Nakia Amour. These ladies are seriously holding it down in Little Rock. They are keeping all the ladies in their area rocking fab hair & flawless makeup. Surprise, surprise...the products are ALL NATURAL!

Leah's line of makeup includes all a girl could want! She carries an array of foundations, shadows, glosses, and blushes with colors for ladies of all complexions. As we chatted, she revealed her curiosity about makeup started because of her time as a dancer & having to wear it for performances. Couple that curiosity with her education in chemical engineering & training as an esthetician and VOILA! I absolutely love her story & gracious personality!

Nakia is the creator of a natural hair care products. Her line includes a pre-conditioning oil, leave-in conditioner, moisturizer and gel. She even has a black soap shampoo that also doubles as a facial wash! I loved that her product line is free of all the icky stuff like silicones and synthetics. A walking billboard for her own product line, her hair was gorgeous & healthy!

Make sure that you venture over to the ladies' websites and check out their products!

Don't we kinda look like long lost sisters!?!?

Stay tuned for part 2 of the happenings from the TN Natural Hair and Wellness Expo...

Teaser...

No time for a real post but I've got some great things in the works...

• I'm blogging & live tweeting from the TN Natural Hair Care & Wellness Expo tomorrow! Stay tuned for a detailed post on the festivities.
• I made it to the 2nd round of interviews for a new position! (Because of this, I have to complete a project by Monday. Eeek! I haven't finished but I have a solid start to it. I'm going to give it my all in some major power sessions this weekend.)
• I'll be featured on fellow curly girl's blog!
• I'm putting together the framework of my own Mastermind group which will start at the end of this month!

Now do you see why I haven't been updating this week? Catch you later!